Alzheimer's Society Innovation Hub

Refusal

Mum refuses to get out of bed and mobilise, wash herself, get showered, wash hair, personal care for nails hands and feet, wearing pads, getting out of bed to allow changing soiled bed linen, up to twice a day. Mum says she is entitled to stay in bed if wants to as at 89 years of age she can do what she wants. Mum sleeps mostly during the day but has sleepless nights, gets up at night moves furniture, draw curtains, etc. Any suggestions to help encourage mum with personal care etc?

edited on Oct 30, 2019 by Tim Shakespeare

Denh Pham 3 weeks ago

Hi Julie,

I wonder if it would be better for you to repost this in the Dementia Talking Point forum?

https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/

Tim Shakespeare 2 weeks ago

This idea has been advanced to the next phase

Tim Shakespeare 2 weeks ago

This idea has been moved back to the current phase

Lise Sproson 1 week ago

As a carer, this is one of the most frequent and stressful elements I have to deal with. It is also a problem for paid carers, as less skillful/confident carers will avoid addressing refusal and simply end the call, allowing Mum to remain wet/dirty or to skip meals and drinks. i have frequently tried to ask that they find creative ways of encouraging and working around refusal, as Mum lacks insight into her dementia and so they need to work around this, but all too often they say that they "can't force her" to do things and end the visit after 5 minutes, leaving me to pick up the pieces and/or Mum to not receive the things she needs to maintain her health and quality of life.
We need research into the most effective ways of dealing with this issue and also funding into better training and sharing of information for both paid and family carers.

Margaret Booth 4 days ago

There are a lot of issues here and the clothing and incontinence streams feed into it. I have recently started using a shampoo bar (for myself) and it does mean I don’t get liquid shampoo running into my eyes so that might be worth trying. I’ve heard people say that their LO doesn’t like showering because the water spray hurts so I wonder if using one of those shower heads that puts air into the water would be a good idea. I didn’t really take on board that water is heavy until I went to visit some historic house somewhere and washed my hands in a very bubby stream of tap water that seemed weightless.

Tim Shakespeare 1 day ago

This idea has been advanced to the current phase